Day 3: Alpha Male

The first time I met him is when he picked me up at the airport. I just arrived after a week holiday in Aceh with my friends. As usual, I followed my guts, risking my life and let a strangers pick me at the airport to drive me home. We already talked for a week, and he always annoyingly called me during the holiday. I was in a condition of don’t believe in love and also relationship. I told my parents that I prefer to live alone rather than spend my life with wrong person. Basically, me being bitch after the heartbroken phase.

But he came and drove me home.

“Do you want to me to go spicy or super spicy?”

“What?”

“Do you want me to drive normal, fast or super fast?

“Well, super fast is fine by me”

“Be careful of what you wished for, girl”

I rolled my eyes, been ‘dating’ with someone who likes to drift and drive-fast made me thinking why men always love to show off their driving skills. So I just told him to drive in whatever speed he likes.

The first time we talked, I knew he’s dominant and an alpha male. He has this strong characters and its difficult for you not to pay attention to him. Obviously, he’s smart. We spent 2 hours talking about politics in one of our phone call, when I was in holiday, and I felt happy to have someone that can discuss about things that I like. The other time, we talked about business idea. And its really nice to have someone that value my opinion and put me equal to him. Or the other time, when I just arrived from Perth to Canberra and felt soooo tired, we both fell asleep during our video call.

But what makes him more interesting is because he knows what he wants. I always bump with a guy who says, “I dont like to be in any relationship, too much drama”. While he is super confidence to put me in his future-plan. All I did only raised my eyebrow. But also flattered because I know he shared his ambitious plan to me. Nothing beats the man who knows what he wants in life and works to make it happen. In this case, he’s pretty ambitious.

I remember the first time he met my mother and told me, “please say hi to your Dad, I’m gonna meet him soon”.

Since he’s the man of the words, he met my Dad two weeks later. And they spent 3 freaking hours discuss about history. And, in the middle of the discussion, he told my Dad that he likes me. My Dad just laughed like its a normal things to hear.

“So, are you a Protestant or Catholic?”

“Saya Yahudi, Om”

I can’t help not to laugh when he answered it with Bahasa and see my Dad’s reaction to it. My Dad tried to be super cool with his answer. And they continue talking about history, politic and stuffs. In the end, they both like and admire each other. Seems like a happy ending, rite? Well…

It is not easy to be with him, tho, with all the circumstances between us. Plus at that time I know I’m gonna be back to Australia to spend another year for my study. But, he is my mirror. It’s a bit funny but we have a lot of similarities, or in my opinion, he’s the best version of myself (or he thought that he’s the worst version of myself). We both know each other logical thinking. We both super stubborn and hate being in control.

Do I like him? His strong characters hard to resist. I love being with an alpha male, or I could say dangerous person. It makes me wanted to be as strong as he is. I told him that I wanted to learn from him. But what I like about him, is his smile when he with kids. The genuine and pure smile. Maybe he appears bold but he has a soft spot for children. And that soft spot in his heart get the attention from the child inside me. Oh, and I love his grumpy face, it is so cute that you can’t help not to tease him (pull his cheeks for example lol).

However, the future is full of uncertainty. Long-distance relationship is difficult. We have this ‘funny’ agreement to ‘suspend’ our relationship and remain to be friend until we meet again in the future. And I know attachment is a burden so I keep myself busy to do many things. I believe that if we meant to be together, we will be together somehow. Moreover, after the heartbroken things (I know it silly but its true), I’m still not ready in any commitment yet. You know that you need time to heal and think about what you want. And I’m tired with expectations.

I feel grateful to know him in short time. And the distance and times differences actually really helpful especially if I woke up in the middle of the night and need someone to call. Or when I was stuck in my essays and he’s willing to help me out with my abstract idea. Or when in a middle of conversation he asked about my parents (and when I call my parents, they asked about him too!! why they just don’t call each other -_-).

As he’s about to go back to States in near time for his business, and I’m still in Down Under until next year. So, cheers to the uncertainty.

 

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